Halim 101

1.He's a terrible shopping partner. Hauled ass a mile away during our recent shopping trip to BluSh!!

2.He keeps me grounded. Nailed to the floor. I tend to overspend sometimes.

3.He drives too slow, when I'm in the car lah.

4.He's a Transformers wannabe.

5.He loves coffee, just like me.

6.I think he'a gay, altough he denies it.

7.He's always refering me as his a.k.a everything.

8.He complains all the time. About the weather, bitches that he doesnt have a girlfriend, his sucky laptop..etc..etc...etc..To sum it up, he's a TOTAL BITCH sometimes!

9.He's good with computers.

10.He's a loyal friend, though he doesn't show it, but actions speaks louder than words.

11.He's into weird music and shit(he listens to Apocalyptica!)

12.He's protective. It annoys me sometimes.

13.He's very good with kids. My kids adore him.

14.He's doesn't want a girlfriend. (Yeah rite, bro!)

15.He watches porn. He knows a whole lot on BDSM. (wikipaedia geek) EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!

16.He talks hill billy with me (though it comes out all Jamaican)

17.He doesn't drink.

18.He smokes Sempoerna Menthol ( I call them ciggie for pussies!) He also smokes like one.

19.He hates the colour of my nail polish.

20.He bugs me all the time, especially when he's bored, hungry,or needs a chat.

21.He gives me sound, and helpful advice. Sometimes.

22.He's your typical MCP.

23.He gets upset when he sees me cry. He consoles me and then calls me a Baby! He's a pussy too!!!

24.He hates veggies. I hate him for that coz I like green.

25.He's got a nick for himself " Gaban". Konon.

26.He's into cars.

27.He's such a mama's boy.

28.He can't swim to save his BIG ASS.

29.He cries when I call him a loser. (Mama's Boy)

30.He would love to have a set of twins when he's married.

31.He believes in "deflowering' himself ONLY when he's married ( whether to a dude or a girl)

32.He needs to get laid...BAdly!

33.He has never seen a woman naked. He's 28. Poor Clueless Soul!!

34.He listens to my advice but complains, bitches about it later on.

35.He doesn't makes sense...at all.

36.He reads car magazines/ articles of sorts. He's much into reading, like me.

37.He thinks maintaining a car is easier than maintaining a girl.

38.He can't seem to shut the hell up when a topics catches his interest.

39.He sometimes talks in an American accent. Sounds horrible!!!

40.He knows he can NEVER win a fight with me. Yaah....heel boy..!!!

41.He likes to pick a fight with me, but ALWAYS ends up losing.

42.He's a sore loser. I win a card game, he grumbles and leave. Pussy!!

43.He hates that I call him a pussy,MCP.

44.He's slow. Walks like a sloth. A slug has more pace!!!

45.He slouches..he walks like Frankeinstein.

46.He's not morning person.

47.He hates clubbing.

48.He's a "self confessed" fridge. Yah....ok!

49.He doesn't mind me "sampling" his food.

50.He actually enjoys spending time with my kids, nephews. They climb all over him.

51.He "gels" well with my cousins. They actually like having him around.

52.He loves having MONEY but doesn't have any.

53.He enjoys "rock" songs and quotes that it's an "Orchestrated Chaos"

54. We share the same interests (well, almost) : Talking bout absolute rubbish ALL DAY LONG., P.Ramlee movies,

55.He does a comedic and hilariously funny impersonation of Hj. Bakhil. Cracks me up every time.

56.He got friends(whom i've never met) and calls themselves the 3 stooges, Bujang Lapok, or The 3 Musketeers. Yah....ok!!!!

57.He's also a neat freak like me. Calls himself "Monk".

58.Always provokes me into going ballistic fits with his constant..
- Sita, why wear that?
- Don't buy that. It's too expensive.
- Don't burp like that. It's gross
- Don't cut your hair like that
- Okaaayyy...please don't scream when i say.......
- Don't eat so fast..bla bla bla
- Don't scream like that..People looking at us lah...yada...yada...yada....

59.He's reads very fast. But nothing stays! Slugs have better absorption rate. He's no sponge!!!

60. He lets people bully him. and he doesn't fight back. Hates confrontations, he says. Pussy!!

61. Bitches about "hanging around with me too much, but calls "ME" every single day!!!!

To sum it up, although he's flawed n imperfect in SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many ways, he's still a dear friend. He too has helped me a lot, especially after Shahril left.

61. He gossips like a girl...I mean PUSSY!!!

62. Hates when I start correcting his grammar.

63. Headstrung, stubborn.

64. Doesn't believe in us being "kindered spirits", but rather, "hindered".

65. Doesn't even own a freakin' rice cooker. GOD!!!

66. He's rude, obnoxious, and egoistic.

67. A pussy!!!

68. He's grossed out by "cicaks".

69. Hates being in the limelight, but never fails to create one for himself.

70. His jokes aren't funny.

71. He loves the beach.

72. He laughes like a hyena in heat.

73. He doesn't own a passport.

74. Thinks he's an alien liveform, coz he doesn't eat most things we HUMANS eat.

75. A "DIVA" when it comes to food. His food must be prepared in a certain way. "Oh, I want the garlic to be fried this way..bla..bla...bla..!! My Ass.
Havin meals can be very taxing with him.

76. Thinks that nobody is good enuff for him...or is it the other way around????

77. He hates that I watch "chick flicks".

78. Had been with a girl in the same freakin' room but didn't have sex. Big "L" there!!!

79. He'a an ass...............man!

80. Once kicked his housemate out, coz the poor sod often sleeps in front of the telly. Got an earful from me, i'll tell u that!!!

81. Has never spoken to his ex- housemate.

82. He's a Band Manager for someone we know!

83. Can't sing to save his life!

84. He's too trusting sometimes. People take advantage of him.

85. He knows when to shut-up when he sees me lose my temper.

86. Once walked from VADS to Kota Damansara coz he only had 60 cents in his pocket.

87. Laughs at his own jokes.

88. Too blind to know that they are people who cares about him.

89. Always say that the world is out to get him, but i think he's got a problem with the world. He just refuse to believe it.

90. VERY LOW SELF CONFIDENCE!!!

91. NO SELF ESTEEM.

92. Have this thing for cartoon network and The Discovery Channel. Doesn't watch the news he says. Too depressing!!!

93. Hates being labelled a fashion freak.

94. Endm


Yes,he may be flawed in many ways but here's the thing. I have always believed that everyone has flaws, we're imperfect people living in an imperfect world.

We have learnt to accept these "flaws" and just get in with our lives. You just can't try to change everyone. He may be an "annoyance" to you but maybe that's what makes them your friend. U just learn to accept. Period. But u can't NEVER change a PUSSY!!!!!